Wednesday was a busy day for us. We awoke in Harrisburg, PA at the home office after bringing a trailer down from one of the company’s lots in Wappingers Falls, NY the previous night. After showering, which happily we are able to do in our new bigger sleeper truck, we went in to find out where Kevin, the dispatcher wanted the trailer unloaded. After getting unloaded, Vince dropped off paper work and pick up needed supplies before we were off to the Petro truck stop in Carlisle, PA.
Vince dropped me off at the Petro so I could do laundry while he went off to get a Pennsylvania inspection for the truck. Since the home office is in PA part of having the truck registered in PA means Vince must get an inspection every six months. Rather than me sitting around a shop waiting, I asked for him to drop me at the truck stop so I could do the laundry. By the time Vince returned the laundry was done and we were both ready to eat since we missed lunch, so we grabbed an early dinner at the Iron Skillet inside the Petro.
Around 9:00 that evening I was a little hungry since we had technically ate lunch/dinner at 4:00 pm. So I hinted to Vince that I might be a little hungry. He picked up on the hint and asked if I would like to go into the Iron Skillet for dessert. Since they have a great cherry cobbler that is the perfect size for us to share, I jumped right on his suggestion.
When we arrived at the restaurant we grabbed a booth in the trucker’s area. As we were talking the waiter came up from behind me and stated “Hello sir, do you need a menu?” We in unison stated we were just having dessert. He then asked “what would you like to drink sir? Let me also add, the waiter is standing with his back to me addressing Vince the whole time, never acknowledging me. So Vince ordered a Sierra Mist and I said I wanted water into the air because I didn’t believe anyone was listening.
Now the waiter we knew was a foreigner but I have never had any problem at any restaurant with a foreign waiter not welcoming and acknowledging me. Also I am almost 5’6’ and 150 pounds so I am neither short nor petite so trust me he couldn’t miss me sitting in the booth. As we sat there we began talking about the situation and agreed it had to be a mistake, that the service would get better and when he returned with both drinks we were encouraged.
But we were so wrong because when he returned he continued to keep his back to me even when I ordered the Cherry Cobbler which Vince informed him we would be sharing. When he returned to the table he proceeded to put it down directly in front of Vince then quickly hurry away. Well rest assured I knew when he came back I was going to confront him.
As he returned and again began to address Vince, I jumped in and asked very loudly as I finally caught his eye “You do realize you are in America?” Well he was stunned and looked at me bewildered. I went on to tell him he was in America and in America he needed to address woman and wait on woman. He then told me “I am not an American” with which I quickly replied “right but you are IN America and you need to acknowledge woman. He then looked at Vince like he didn’t understand or maybe it was a, you need to shut her look but since I couldn’t see his face I don’t know. Vince then told him “Do you not see my wife sitting here?” “You have ignored her like she isn’t here, she is here and you needed to acknowledge her”. He then just walked away like he didn’t care. I don’t believe he didn’t understand what we were saying I believe he was choosing to ignore it.
So then when we got up to the counter the cashier/possibly the manager asked if everything was okay Vince told her no the service was not good, since the waiter ignored me the whole time. She then had the nerve to say “well I guess that is how they may do things in his country". I jumped in and stated “but he is in America and he needs to acknowledge and wait on woman or he is going to have a lot of problems. It was like a light went on in her head (duh) and she got this look like wow yeah and she stated “you’re right”. To say I was ticked off the rest of the night is an understatement but trust that guy will never wait or should I say not wait on me again.
I have absolutely no problem with people coming to this country to start a better life. I have some very special people in my life who have done exactly that, but for others I say please know you need to adjust to our culture especially if you are going to be in the service industry. You shouldn't think you are going to take our money but not serve us.
Aunt Joan, I have waited tables for thirteen years. I have learned you never know where a good tip will come from. I once waited on a couple where the lady was obviously very young and pregnant, and the young gentleman had tattoos all over his arms and neck. His ears, nose and eyebrows were pierced. I brought them everything they asked for and waited on them like I do anyone who comes into the restaurant. When I went to bus the table after they left. They left me 25 dollars (which was a hundred percent tip) and had filled out a comment card that said I had given them the best service of their lives. My manager said that the young couple had stopped him on their way out to rave about me. The sad thing is that these kids probably get ignored or avoided by other waitstaff when they go out for a meal. The safest thing to do is to treat everyone the same, and think about how you would like to be treated if it was you having the meal.
ReplyDeleteMary, I totally agree with you that you should “never judge a book by its cover”. Your story is a lovely example of that and I have no doubt you have been a favorite waitress of many individuals because of your positive attitude. In our case I believe that this was a cultural practice this waiter thought he could bring to his workplace. It appeared he did not view women as equals therefore no woman was going to receive service from him. My problem was not with this cultural attitude although as you can imagine I don’t agree with it, but with the fact that he thought he could bring that attitude to work. What he does in his home and among his friends and family is one thing because as we all know that is one of the main reasons this country was established and is one of the main attractions to so many that come here. But in America when you take a job as a waiter you have to wait on everyone. This country has come a long way in dealing with discrimination and he needs to understand that concept and if he doesn’t want to do so, he needs to get out of the service industry.
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